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Happy Parenting | Parenting Solutions – Positive Reinforcement Or Bribery When

Sunday, March 28th, 2010

How do you discipline your child? Most of the parents would have the experience of spanking their children at least once as part of parenting discipline. In behavioral studies and parenting laws, 3 approaches to coax a desired action from a child can also be found in styles of parenting: positive reinforcement, negative reinforcement, or punishment.

Positive reinforcements involves the parenting giving the child a reward like a toy or sweets when he or she has done something agreeable and that parents want to see the child repeat. The opposite technique of getting a child to perform a desired action is called negative reinforcements (e.g. child learns to do his homework for fear of punishment or embarrassment in school the following day). Punishment, is a more severe form of negative reinforcements, that results in increasing the penalty of doing something that is frowned upon.

Child experts agree that, of the 3, the best way to encourage positive behavior in children is using positive reinforcement. Not only that, but positive reinforcements help teach your child to make good decisions through knowing what’s right and what’s wrong. Punishments are not ideal because the child only conforms to the wishes of the parent for fear of punishment, and it does not help them to understand why voluntarily.


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A common parenting discipline misconception that parents have is mixing up positive reinforcements with bribing your child. Bribing involves giving in to your kid’s demands and he or she is rewarded with an item that is more valuable than the act performed. Encouragement, on the other hand, can involve giving a pat on the back or verbally praising the kid. In this way, children are taught to understand right from wrong and to do good things out of their own free will, rather than just in order to earn a prize.

Other parents do not like to give rewards to their kids in order not to spoil them. However, giving small prizes is okay if it suits the appropriate action your kid performs. In other words, a small action deserves a small gift and same goes for a larger action. The rewards do not need to be expensive items; small rewards are hardly damaging. The best positive reinforcements are simple but powerful actions such as giving your kid a pat on the back or a smile. It’s common sense parenting.

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